Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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