He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
