this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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