At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
