I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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