Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
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