thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize