i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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