She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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