all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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