He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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