Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
