I want you more than these girls want KFC
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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