please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
