I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
