I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize