make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
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