Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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