This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
