im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
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