Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
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