I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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