I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize