Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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