Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
