Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Randomize
