I think I just saw someone hide a body.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Randomize