its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
