people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
