We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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