okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
