were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
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