it wasn't lemon gatorade
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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