How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize