All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Randomize
