You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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