Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
