he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
