She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
