I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
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