i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Do vagina's smell?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
