just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Blood and glitter go together right?
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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