i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
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At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
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Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
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