My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Randomize