I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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