What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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