something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I'm getting married
To pizza
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
