i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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