he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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