Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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