Rock
Scissors
Fuck
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
i out mim tonsoeep
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