Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Randomize
